From Dad

HEAVEN IS A WONDERFUL PLACE
My dear wife Jeanette knows that now in a way that we too shall one day know, through our faith in Jesus Christ. I am grateful to the angels that
bore her up to her eternal life in the mansions prepared for us by our Savior, Jesus.
Those angels include the three daughters that God gave us named Deborah, Sharon, and Amy. As she served them all her days here on earth, so they returned the loving favor by providing extraordinary care for her in her final days here on earth. They were ably assisted by Monarch Hospice nurse Laura and all the medical personnel that shaped the plan of action. A host of angels completed the loving environment by providing every imaginable comfort. Food was supplied in abundance, visitors arrived to bring comfort, flowers and cards arrived daily, prayer support was widespread from across the nation and beyond, quilters added their artistic contributions, clergy visited and called to add their devotional thoughts and prayers, veterans of this cancer trail added insight from experience, and so it progressed. From September 12, when the cancer was first diagnosed during a trip to the ER at Delnor Hospital, to October 12, when a host of angels gathered in a joyful celebration of life at Immanuel Lutheran Church, we were involved in a whirlwind of activity that clearly illustrated the ultimate truth that GOD IS LOVE. I could fill the rest of this newsletter with detailed reports of angels that contributed to this incredible journey. But let it suffice to say that I am forever grateful to the countless number of family and friends that upheld us in their arms as we awaited the arrival of the final host of angels that carried Jeanette into the arms of our Lord to take up her place in the
heavenly realms prepared by our Savior, Jesus. It has been an incredible journey! We have witnessed an amazing masterpiece of the Creator's loving handiwork. No quilt can match the quiltwork that our Lord performed as he gathered my beloved wife to the place where she awaits
the happy reunion of all who place their hope in Jesus Christ. May this be a spiritual learning experience for all who knew and loved Jeanette! Jesus Christ is risen!
He is risen indeed! Alleluia!
Pastor Donald Moll

Details

Visitation

NOTE: Visitation is NOT at the Funeral Home

Sunday, October 11

4-9 pm

Immanuel Lutheran Church

950 Hart Road, Batavia IL

Memorial Service

Monday, October 12

7 pm

Immanuel Lutheran Church

950 Hart Road, Batavia IL

In Memoriam:

Mom chose Immanuel Lutheran Church and Monarch Hospice for donations to be made in memoriam of her life. Donations can be sent to the church - indicate "Jeanette Moll" on the donation. The church will also send donations to Monarch Hospice if that is where you would like them to go. Dad will work with the church to designate how the donations will be used.

Links and Info

First another old Magee picture. The bottom of this picture says Muellers and Magees. I'll let you guess which kid is which. I'm guessing the baby is Mary. Mom is the tallest girl in the picture.

Links of interest

http://www.mossfuneral.com/obituaries

http://www.immanuelbatavia.org/jeanette_moll_memorial.htm

Logistics

I talked briefly to Dad and Deb just now. As I understand it - here are the details for the funeral. Please check the blog again tomorrow to get the final information.

Sunday, 4-9 pm , Visitation at Immanuel Lutheran Church on Hart Rd in Batavia, IL

Monday, 7 pm, Memorial Service, Immanuel Lutheran Church

Instead of flowers, Mom requested that donations be given to either Immanuel Lutheran Church or Monarch Hospice. Link to Immanuel is to your right on this page. I will get the information for Monarch and post it.

I will post finalized details once I'm sure I have them right.

Heaven

Mom died peacefully this morning.

One More Classic Family Shot

I thought the blog needed another classic family shot to bring smiles to everyone. This looks like a shot from Deb's confirmation so probably 1973. At this point, words escape me......

Soon

Mom has taken another turn for the worst. Her breathing is getting very difficult, her color is not good and she is not able to move at all on her own.

We expect that her journey on earth will end soon. We pray that this is a peaceful and quick process and we know she is headed to a better place closer to her God.

I will continue to update the blog.

Continuing Progression of the Cancer

This picture said 1957 on the back so Mom would have been 20. Mary brought some of the old snapshots that she had with her to Batavia so I have even more pictures for the blog.

The cancer is continuing to rapidly progress. Mom is very weak and asleep most of the time and continually on oxygen. She is barely able to speak. The hospice nurse was at the house yesterday and worked with Deb and Dad on strategies to keep mom as comfortable as possible.

So many kindnesses have been extended to our family during this time and we want to thank all of you. From Aunts, Uncles and Cousins who have come to visit (From near and far) and brought food, flowers and visits, to Church members who have come for visits, brought meals, driven people to the airport, stayed with mom, cleaned, mowed the lawn and prayed, to all the people who are reading the blog and responding, and to all the people who are praying daily for us we want to extend our sincere thanks. Thanks also to friends of our family both near and far who have sent flowers, gift baskets, and prayers. It means so much to us that so many people care and so many people have been touched by mom and dad's love.

Shari is working on collage of pictures of mom's quilts. If you have received a quilt from my mom, take a picture of the person it was for, next to the quilt and send it to 272 S. Forest, Batavia, IL 60510, or e-mail it to Shari at ksmjkappel@yahoo.com.

Still Taking Care of Us

I am in the Denver airport on my way back to Boise. It was very difficult to leave today even though Mom is in incredibly good hands as Mary, Keith, Deb and Dad are all there.



As I was leaving the house, after a tearful goodbye to mom, Dad came out to the garage. I was driving Dad's car out to OHare. (Uncle Keith was coming in from Seattle and drove it back.) Mom had sent him out to make sure the "I-Pass" (automatic toll payer) was in the car. Even in her most difficult and painful time - Mom was taking care of me.



Many more times than I would like to admit, I have been annoyed at my mother for "hounding" me. Yet today, it became crystal clear to me that she has spent her whole life taking care of others. That what I have perceived as nagging or hounding was simply her way of caring for me and I was too independent and too arrogant to appreciate it as an expression of her love.



I am incredibly grateful to have spent the last 10 days caring for my mother. To finally have the opportunity to express my love for her and to really listen to her. I am incredibly sad that it required terminal cancer to bring us this close.


I am now at home in Boise, attempting to re-enter my "normal" world. I received emails from both Deb and Dad this morning that Mom's cancer continues to progress. The pain medication dose has been doubled and she has started on oxygen. Deb definitely arrived at the right time as her medical knowledge helps give the other care givers a lot of confidence that we are doing the right thing.

One Two Three

Mom is feeling a little better today. We seem to have the nausea under control and the pain meds are staying down. She is still very weak and the amount of time she has visitors is limited to make sure she gets enough rest. A hospital bed was delivered today and we are hoping to be able to set it up in way that Mom can stay comfortable and we can continue to care for her.

Mary arrived in the early afternoon and is already cleaning and scrubbing. Keith is flying in tomorrow and Deb is coming up from St. Louis for a few days. I am heading back to Boise. It will be difficult to leave tomorrow.

A Rough Day

Mom's not in this picture but I thought it really needed to be posted. First of all, it clearly shows that Mom's knack for sewing started early as she made us identical dresses for both Easter and Christmas. We sure look cute but the downside is that I had to wear the same dress for six year. I would grow out of mine and then get Shari's and grow out of that and then get Deb's. It could explain why now I always just wear black. I'm not exactly sure whose couch that is behind us but it's pretty scary-looking.

Mom had a rough day today. She had several bouts of severe nausea which makes it challenging to keep the pain meds down. We are not sure if the nausea is from increasing the dosage on the meds or the progression of the cancer. This afternoon we got some anti-nausea medications in her system and she is a little more comfortable now. We also have some fast acting morphine that goes under her tongue that can help with the pain. We are taking it hour by hour and doing our best to keep her comfortable. Visits will be very limited until we can get Mom comfortable.

Wedding Traditions

It seems that smashing the cake into your beloved's face was not yet in fashion when Mom and Dad got married. I just found the stash of old pictures so my sisters better beware.

The hospice nurse was by today. Mom's dosage of pain meds has been increased and it seems to have helped. I do notice her getting a bit physically weaker each day. She is also sleeping more today - which I take as an indication that the pain meds are working and she is comfortable enough to sleep.

Aunt Penny came by today and helped out with all the things that I can't handle - unfortunately that list is quite long and includes shopping and ironing. Dick and Sue Wauer and their daughter Laura from Immanuel brought over an incredible dinner. I loved the pear salad and the pumpkin ale. I drank Mom's ale for her.

Stitches in Time

The pictures above are a quilt that Mom made for me about a year ago - it is a modification to the "wedding ring" pattern. Mom took her first quilting class in 2000. We were just looking at her first quilt the other night. I calculated that if you put all of Mom's creations in the last 10 years (the quilts, throws, wall hangings and other projects) end to end, they would circle the globe 2.38 times at the equator. For my more scientific friends that is approximately one mole of quilts (6.02 X 10^23).

Mom's pain and weakness are a little worse each day. We talked to the hospice nurse this morning and the dosage on the pain meds was increased. That is keeping Mom comfortable. She is still able to get around and sat at the dining room table for dinner tonight. She had quite a few friends visit today. We try to make sure she doesn't get too worn out and gets enough time to nap. Aunt Penny is coming down from Barrington tomorrow to help out. I'm still looking for someone who wants to clean the bathrooms. Shari and Billy did it last weekend so I can probably sneak back to Boise without doing it myself and leave the dirty bathroom for Aunt Mary.

The Joys of Her Life

My niece and nephews, Mom's grandkids, have been the joy of Mom's life for the last 24 years. From the left, Jake, Matt, Mom, Dad, Mike, and Andrea. Your challenge is to scroll through the old pictures and see if they have any Magee in them. Find the Magee relative that most resembles each grand kid.

Mom's pain seems to be escalating a bit and we called the hospice nurse this evening to investigate our options relative to increased dosage. The nurse suggested doubling up on the oxycodone dose and that seems to have helped by the time Mom went to sleep this evening.

Uncle Bob, Aunt Penny and Cousin Ruth brought dinner over this evening. Scalloped potatoes and ham was the main dish. I don't usually like scalloped potatoes but I had two helpings of these.

Folks from church came and mowed the lawn today and trimmed the bushes today. It was all done in about 15 minutes as they have a professional lawn service business. I am continually amazed by the support group my mother and father have around them through the Immanuel Lutheran and Word of Life communities. It is making this time so much easier for all of us.

A great photo of Mary and Mom. Mom and Mary are 11 years apart in age so I'll let you guess how old they are.

The hospice nurse came by today. She is coming by twice a week to check on Mom and take her vital signs. Mom's physical condition has stabilized and the pain meds are doing their job. I think we have the daily care routine down fairly well at this point and the house has been rearranged to make it easier for Mom to get around and for us to care for Mom. Mom felt well enough to sit at the table and have a little spaghetti with Dad and I tonight. She has also been sleeping fairly well at night and only got up once last night.

I am staying until Sunday. Mary will arrive on Saturday and is planning to stay for two weeks. Keith is also planning on coming out for several days. Shari will be out a couple weekends in October and will then spend a whole week here in late October. So we feel comfortable that Mom will have the best care we can give her.

Sunday

Another classic Magee family photo. From the left: Mom, Mary (on Mom's lap), Keith, Darryl, Dave and Jimmy.

I'm going to stay at Mom and Dad's until Sunday. Shari headed back to Nashville this mornign and Billy heads back to Boise tomorrow. I believe all the major furniture moving in the house is done for now. Mom has seemed to be relatively pain free over the last day. She even sat at the kitchen table for a couple of meals.

A Good Day

Five Magees! You can barely see Mom in this picture as she is holding Keith. Darryl is in front, Jimmy on the left, and Dave is on the right. Speaking of the Magees, Darryl, Lou, Jimmy and Kathy came to see Mom yesterday. They drove in from Iowa and spent a couple hours visiting. It was great to see them.

Mom had a good day. She was grimacing a lot less today. I think it helped that she did not have any appointments and did not need to go anywhere so she could focus on resting. Shari and I have been working on optimizing the living room set-up to make it easiest for Mom. She now has two reclining chairs that she is pretty comfortable in - with pillows supporting her. One of them is a lift chair which means it can tip all the way forward and all the way back making it easy for her to get out. The other is the leather lazy boy type chair that is a little more comfortable for sleeping.

Carcinoid Tumor

Mom, Dad and I visited the oncologist today. The doctor had the results from the needle biopsy and the PET scan. The tumor near or in Mom's lung is a carcinoid tumor - I added a link off to your right if you want to read more. The tumor is atypical and very aggressive. Mom also lit up the PET scan with tumors in her lymph nodes, neck, upper arms, ribs and back (upper and lower). For this type of tumor, chemotherapy is not necessarily effective and would need to be very aggressive. At this point, our focus is managing the pain and keeping Mom as comfortable as possible.

I'm on Mom and Dad's computer so I don't have any photos to post.

A Better Day

Sticking with our young Magee theme today. This is Mom and Uncle Jimmy. So Mom is probably around 1 or 2 in this shot

Mom had a much better day today. Although pain is still present, it was manageable today and the primary sore spot seemed to be her upper right shoulder (scapula). Her right side overall is much weaker than her left. Mom went to her regular doctor today and the results of the needle biopsy on the tumor near her lung showed it was an atypical carcinoid tumor. Deb and I did some research on the web about this type of cancer but we should find out more tomorrow after a visit to the oncologist

All three of us (Deb, Shari and I) were here tonight which resulted in some good laughs and a few good cries. Deb heads back to St. Louis tomorrow morning. Shari will head back to Nashville on Saturday.

Hospice

I'm back to young Magee family pictures. I thought I would give my sisters a break from the parade of bad 70's fashion. I'm on my way to Chicago and sitting in the Boise airport waiting for the flight to Denver where I connect to Chicago.

Mom, Dad, and Deb met with the nurse from the local hospice organization. They were all very pleased with the hospice approach and with the services that they can offer. Deb described it as a big weight off her shoulders that they will be able to provide what Mom needs and she will be able to stay at home.

Mom's physical condition and her strength is deteriorating rapidly. She remains very strong mentally. I'm looking forward to seeing her.

The Comfort Zone

The Meers sent me these photos yesterday. They are from December 1979 when the Meers visited Batavia. We're not exactly sure why Shari thinks she is in the witness protection program and cannot show her face in a photo. I'm also hoping these photos to inspire the rest of you to send embarrassing photos of the Moll family. The 70's were such a terrific fashion disaster and I know we fully participated so send your evidence my way.

Deb has been at Mom and Dad's since Friday night and has made a huge effort to keep Mom comfortable. She has the east end of the living room set up as Mom's sanctuary and has outfitted one of the big "lazy boy" chairs with extra foam and heating pads and a rolling hospital like table. All of Deb's nursing training is coming in handy too. I'm not sure she can teach me to be as an effective of a caregiver but I am looking forward to trying when I get to Batavia tomorrow.

After a conversation with the oncologist, Mom has been switched over to a ocycontin/oxycodone combination of drugs. These seem to be doing a better job of managing the pain and giving Mom more comfort.

Pain Management

Mom is tough. She was raised on a farm in Iowa and is the oldest of 6 kids. This picture is one of my favorites. Aunt Mary must be about 2 or 3 which means Mom is 13 or 14 in this photo. I really like the candle!

The amount of pain Mom is feeling is continuing to escalate and specific pains are appearing in new places including some near her ribs. Mom is also experiencing increased weakness and difficulty in getting around. Deb, Dad, and Mom spent some time on the phone with the oncologist today and they are changing her medications to help alleviate the overall pain and keep Mom more comfortable. Deb has also engineered more cushioning and additional heating pads for comfort.

Oh How We've Grown and Changed

I thought you would like to see how the family has grown and changed over the years! Yes, Mom looks good in every single one of these pictures!

Dad's knee was feeling a little better last night and he was able to put some weight on it. Mom had a pretty good day too. The Z's were getting the lawn mowed and trimmed, the laundry done, and bbqing. They also got wireless set up in the house and a laptop so Mom can surf the internet a little easier and keep in touch with everyone. Unfortunately for Mom, I'm not sure any of her daughters inherited the cleaning gene. I'm pretty good at writing a check to someone to have them clean my house but that's about the extent of my abilities.

I thought the Magees had the bad knees

Deb, Andrea, and Mike made it safely to Batavia last night. Carolyn picked Andrea up at the airport yesterday afternoon and drove her out. Deb and Mike arrived later that evening. This morning when Deb called me, Dad had twisted his knee and was also hobbling around the house. I told him to ice it (frozen peas work great). I haven't heard yet how he's doing this afternoon.

This is not a great picture in quality but it is five generations of the oldest living female in each generation. Well, at least I think that's right. Hopefully someone will correct me if I got that wrong. The baby is Deb. Mom is holding her. Grandma Magee is behind Mom.

Even More Tests

Mom had a much better night last night and today it was back to the doctor for the needle biopsy of the tumor in her lung. The word from Dad this morning is that they were already delayed when they arrived this morning so it looks like it will be a long day for them.

Deb, Andrea, and Mike are headed up for the weekend. We hope Mom will be able to put them all to work.

Mom has always indicated she was not that enthusiastic of a fan of dogs. However, all of my dogs have always loved Mom and in fact Murf regularly likes to climb in her lap when she comes to visit. In fact, I have even seen Mom petting Murf. Well, now we have proof she's been a dog person all along.

A Tough Night

Mom had a PET scan done yesterday which involved laying in some uncomfortable positions for about an hour. Last night was a little rough for her as she developed significant pain in her upper leg. The pain subsided early in the morning and she and dad were able to get some sleep. They decided to postpone the bone scan that was scheduled for today to give mom a chance to rest.

Below I've attached one of my favorite pictures of Mom and Dad. They are so clearly happy and in love. And Dad's ears look really big in the picture.

More Tests

Here is a picture of mom at a slightly younger age. The writing on the bottom says Jeannette in Forest Park. I'm thinking she is probably three or four in this picture.

Mom has a series of additional tests and scans this week that will help the doctor understand what is going on and what might be the best options for treatment. She returns to see the oncologist on Thursday 9/24. Dad indicated that she is sleeping a little better.

Mom and Dad have a lot of visitors over the next month including, Deb, Andrea and Mike, then Billy and I, then Shari, Kurt, Jake and Matt and finally Aunt Mary is heading out the end of October.

I think an email went out that was missing a "dot" in the web address so let folks know they can log in with http://www.jeanettemoll.blogspot.com/

Medical Info

Mom started experiencing pain in early July in her shoulder, back and ribs. The pain has limited her ability to get around and participate in her normal activities (like baking chocolate chip cookies) and she has had a hard time sleeping. A CT scan on Saturday, Sept 12 revealed several tumors in and around her lungs, surrounding lymph nodes, ribs and several vertebrae in her spine. Mom and dad had an appointment with an oncologist in Geneva on Monday, Sept 14. The doctor indicated she would like to run additional scans and tests to get a better idea of the type of tumors, primary site (probably lung), and extent of metastasis so she can present treatment options to mom and dad. We anticipate having more information by the end of this week or early next week. We will keep you updated through this blog site.

Mom is in good spirits and she would love to hear from you - especially stories about you, your family and things that are happening in your life.

I'll be working on the blog to make it easier for folks to comment.

Mom also required that I only post pictures of her where she looks good. I have decided to modify that requirement and decided that I am allowed to post family pictures where we ALL look bad - it turns out there are a number of those. See what I mean

First Post

If Mom (Jeanette) is okay with this, I will keep a blog to keep all of her many friends and relatives up to date on her. It will hopefully enhance the communication between all of us.

Here is Mom and Dad at their 50th wedding anniversary in August 2008


Here is Mom (Jeanette) a few years before her 50th wedding anniversary - on the farm in Iowa.